"Hear Yee, Hear Yee and Shalom! The Royal Chelmkins taketh this opportunity to indicate a portion of our Bar Mitzvah fit for King David. Rumour is founded. We will indeed be bringing out the royal lights, the royal acts, and the royal scribe, who has eloquently quilled the music for the royal-est of scores. And, be of certain, the royal kosher cuisiniere has recipe-ed a selection of the finest edibles, sure to leave you schnorring some for home.
Only once shall King David turn 13, so, fasteneth the right shoes for dance, as we open the doors to our secret world, in royal honouration of this splendiferous milestone.”